It became tough to accept what I was going through at the time, so much to the point I didn’t tell anyone except my siblings and maybe a few family members. It was apparent I had an issue with letting out my feelings so I just kept it to myself, that and I was scared maybe I would get picked on or something. My therapy sessions didn’t get any better for awhile so you can imagine how I felt on the inside. One time I was getting asked questions about my thoughts and the pressure kicked in tremendously, I’ve never felt so inclined to harm another person before… It was tough to hold in all the voices in that period of time and there were days I felt like giving in because maybe it was easier that way. Some days I would imagine all the possibilities or rather outcomes of different reactions if I actually were brave enough to tell others. School was so so stressful because I would have anxiety from being around big crowds and all the noise, even though I had friends I still kept to myself some days to avoid an outburst or a conflict of sorts from having all these negative voices in my head telling me to do things. During my sophomore year I decided it was time to make a change in my life so I made a big decision that didn’t really stick well with my mother for a while but you’ll get the rundown of that in detail for my next post.
I’m chilling with psychosis